Going Digital is the Future

If there’s anything we learned from the pandemic it’s that going digital is the ultimate way to survive as a business. No one expected an event like this to disrupt the world as fast as it did, but we adapted. Lots of corporations switched to being remote or hybrid; and Zoom became a household name. With the world going digital many of us started to realize the importance of marketing ourselves online and there’s no better place than LinkedIn. Membership has climbed to reach over 780 million since the pandemic hit. So there’s no better time than now to upgrade your LinkedIn!

Personal branding is a topic we’re all familiar with. We all know it’s important, but many of us don’t give it the attention it really deserves. Most of the time were just too busy to give it any real time or thought. We think “I know there’s more I could be doing to improve my LinkedIn.” However, in this day and age its crucial to have your personal brand looking clean and professional. Here are a couple of tips and tricks to improve your LinkedIn profile.

Upgrade Your Profile Picture

Your picture is the first thing people see when they click on your LinkedIn profile. It’s important that you get this right. First make sure the picture is a recent photo of you, then make sure your face takes up about 60% of the frame. No long distance shots, and smile with your eyes!

Choose a Background Photo

Choose a background photo that represents either what you do, or your interest in visually interesting way. If you don’t have your own photos to work with, I recommend using a free hd stock image site called Unsplash. Also try to stick with a photo that fits within 1584 (w) x 396 (h) pixels for the best quality.

Get Creative With Your Headline

Your Headline doesnt just have to be what your business is. Try to add a little bit of flair or creativity to it. For example take a look at EA Talent Recruiter Jason Yuan’s LinkedIn headline, “I don’t usually stalk profiles, but when I do I usually have a career opportunity for you. Want to connect!?”. See how he managed to hook your attention and explain what he does? This is what you should be shooting for.

Expand your Network

Linkedin has amazing networking opportunities and has made it very easy to expand your network. One helpful tip is to link your profile with your email address book. LinkedIn will then suggest people you should connect with. Once you start connecting with people you may even notice that you have connections working at companies that you are currently applying for. I strongly suggest if you are in college that you connect with those who go to your school in your major. You never know when that connection may come in handy.

Take Skill Assessments

These are free tests that LinkedIn has created to help you stand out amongst the crowd. According to Linkedin candidates who have certified skills are 30% more likely to get hired. I recommend to getting certified in the Microsoft Excel assessment. It’s a universal skillset that will always help you standout. Obviously the more certified skills you have the better.

Publish Your Own Content

The best way to get noticed on LinkedIn is to publish engaging, long content. You should start pumping these out to start conversations. Make sure it’s interesting. A good tip is to look at the trending articles on LinkedIn News on the right hand side of your account. Look at the trending topics on the platform and share your thoughts or experiences on the topic. If you can don’t be afraid to sprinkle in a little emojis. It may sound stupid but it actually increases reader engagement. Just don’t over do it. Also try to steer away from politics on LinkedIn. This is a platform for professional networking, it’s not Facebook or Twitter.

A Brighter Future Awaits

Upgrading your LinkedIn doesn’t have to be done all in one day. Try to take it in small chunks. These steps may seem trivial at first, but I promise if you knock these out when you have your lunch break, or when find yourself with extra fee time you won’t regret it. Allow LinkedIn to work for you by taking the first step!

This is the time of year when I start thinking about goals and what I want to accomplish next year.  As I look through my goals, I realized a few things I want to remember in 2022:

Maybe You’re Already Reaching Your Goals

When I look at the life “buckets” I want to work on next year, I realized that a few of them, namely learning and socializing more, can be knocked out with my participation in Junior League.  Junior League offers members classes (we call them trainings) in all sorts of topics, everything from healthy eating to stress management to book clubs to special movie screenings. Each member also must volunteer as part of their commitment to Junior League, where I see old friends and meet new people.  It turns out, I have been accomplishing this goal all this time. Maybe you’ve been accomplishing your goals too without realizing it, you’ve just been accomplishing them within the context of what you’re already doing day-to-day.

Productivity Can’t Be Your Only Goal

Productivity is a great economic measure.  It’s not so great for measuring humanity. 

I had an epiphany one day, while bemoaning my lack of productivity.  I remember being so much more productive early on in my career. And then I thought, “Wait a minute.  I am doing work that is completely different from the work I used to do.” My work now is more strategic and graphic design takes time.  And that’s a good thing – it means I am advancing in my development rather than just churning out tactical stuff.

Seasons Change. So Should Your Goals.

Before you start trying to squeeze just one more task into your day, ask yourself, “Have my circumstances changed?  Has my career changed?” I bet you the answer is yes and yes. 

The past two years have been a doozy, for a lot of people.  I’ve had friends who have lost jobs and started new ones, go through heart-breaking loss, or take on more care-taking duties at home.  Considering all of these, its understandable that people would want to cut back in one aspect of their lives to pour more into another part.

Which brings me to…

Be Kind to Yourself

Something Julie reminds us of, especially when things are tough, is that we should give the other person grace.  We should give ourselves grace.  Be a little kinder.  Be the light.

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Perhaps instead of New Year’s resolutions or goals, I should keep these three realizations in mind and make them my themes for the year:

• Sometimes you can reach your goals without inventing a whole new set of actions to reach them.  What goals can you stack together?  How can you accomplish your goals within the context of your everyday? For example, if your goal is to exercise more in the new year and spend time more time with your kids, maybe a family stroll after dinner or a weekend bike ride might get you closer to your goal.

• Don’t do #allthethings.  Do #therightthings. Change up your to-dos in accordance with the seasons of your life.  Sometimes your home life will ask more of you than your work life and vice versa.  Sometimes your volunteer obligations will take over your life for two weeks straight.  Give yourself leeway to accommodate all the aspects of your life when they need to be addressed, not year-round.

• Be kind to yourself.  In the grand scheme of things, we are on this planet for only a moment.  Let’s make it a good one.

Fayetteville, AR, can sometimes feel like a bubble. The craziness of the COVID-19 pandemic still doesn’t seem real here!

I wanted to give you an insider’s look from Fayetteville in relation to the other states.

The Stats

There are 4,012 confirmed cases of the Coronavirus and 91 deaths as of May 10th. A shelter-in-place was never issued in Fayetteville.

Restaurants were allowed to reopen dining rooms starting Monday, May 11. Non-urgent dental services also opened Monday. Pools, water parks and beaches are set to open May 22, with restrictions.

Bars are still closed under Phase 1, which I think is a smart decision. Arkansas has 3 casinos, all of which will be open on May 18. Some stores in Fayetteville opened back up Monday, including thrift stores which I was able to visit.

Phase 1 of Fayetteville Perspective

Phase 1 of this new implementation allows restaurants to be at one third capacity, with seating six feet apart. Employees must wear a mask and gloves, and patrons should wear a mask. If patrons are not wearing masks the restaurant has the right to turn them away. Phase 1 also includes daily health screenings of employees, and groups cannot be larger than ten.

My Perspective from Fayetteville

I am located in an apartment complex near Dickson Street, the central hub for restaurants and bars for students at the U of A. While Dickson street has been mostly shut down, some restaurants offer curbside pickup.

From my perspective in Fayetteville, roughly 50% of people I have observed in the grocery store are wearing masks. It is possible to keep 6 feet apart but difficult, especially if the store is crowded.

Fast food restaurants are all open, and some dining rooms are available with limited seating. The Northwest Arkansas Mall remained open, but most of the stores inside were closed. I have stayed in Fayetteville thus far during the pandemic because I feel it is safer than Dallas, however I will be moving home soon.

What I’ve Learned Through My Perspective From Fayetteville

1. Be respectful. Wear a mask if you feel that is right for you. You are shielding both yourself and others from potential exposure.
2. Supporting local and small businesses is very important during this difficult time. Whether it be patronizing favorite local coffee shops with curbside pickup or stopping in to a new store, I have made efforts to express my appreciation.
3. Just because Fayetteville feels safe, does not necessarily mean it is. Since a shelter-in-place was never issued, people are still going about their days as if everything is normal here. In my perspective from Fayetteville, it is just as important that we preserve our health here as it is anywhere else.

As I was thinking about whether to hit send on my email to Julie, I paused. I had read an article that was interesting to me and I thought Julie would find it interesting too. I momentarily reflected on the longevity of our working relationship together. But, was this article too much? Too personal?

The article was about a topic I care about deeply – but its also a very decisive topic, one I didn’t want to get into an argument with complete strangers about, let alone my boss.

I don’t know why I sent it. All I know is that I did.

My last thought before I hit send was, “Well, they say you should bring your whole self to work, right?”

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Free Froot Loops For All!

Just like ping-pong tables, free breakfast cereal and standing desks before it, the notion of “bringing your whole self to work” is the latest business organizational fad that promises to revolutionize the world of work. It remains to be seen if this is truly the case, or so much business world mumbo jumbo that bursts like a yoga ball under the weight of sky-high expectations.

None of this was on my mind when I entered the workforce. I had the mindset that I didn’t go to work to make friends, these people were my co-workers, colleagues. Nothing more, nothing less. You go into the office, do your job, do good work, go home. Repeat.

I thought I was being “professional.” Looking back, I think I came off as aloof and maybe a little uptight.

Imagine my surprise when Julie would ask me on Monday mornings how my weekend went or if I did anything fun or interesting. “You mean you have an interest in my life outside of work?,” I thought. Huh.

But I digress. This blog post is supposed to be about bringing your whole self to work. But what does that even mean and why would anyone want to do that in the first place?

Bringing Your Whole Self to Work: What It Is

Let’s start by defining what bringing your whole self to work is, and then we can get into what it is not.

When you Google around, and look at the literature about bringing your whole self to work, there are a few common themes that come up. I am cherry-picking the 3 that matter most to me. They are Authenticity, Vulnerability, and Appreciation.

Authenticity – Mike Robbins, a popular thought leader on the topic, defines authenticity as honesty, minus self-righteousness plus vulnerability. People who are authentic with others are honest about the situation at hand, even if being honest means looking bad or it opens them up to criticism. Being authentic means being vulnerable.

Vulnerability – Its very difficult to put yourself in a vulnerable place. You don’t know what’s going to happen next. That’s why most people put on their “armor” when they walk through the office door. Best not to admit your fears or faults, lest someone use them against you. But overtime, that armor becomes incredibly heavy. It rusts and calcifies, and after a while, you do too.

Maybe its time to put the armor down, if only for a little while.

Appreciation – I don’t mean gold stars and carrots. Thank someone for the work they put in, not just the stellar end result.

Tell someone you admire the growth you’ve seen in them. Appreciate your co-workers kindness, thoughtfulness, people skills, etc. When you appreciate the little, human things about people, it makes their faults easier to understand, easier to accommodate, easier to work with. It also makes you easier to work with too.

Bringing Your Whole Self to Work: What It Is Not

Bringing your whole self to work is not:

• “Letting it all hang out.”
• Telling your co-workers about the most intimate parts of your love life.
• Berating people over past grievances.
• Clipping your nails at your desk, microwaving fish in the company kitchen, or making tacky, vulgar jokes for shock value.

Authenticity, and its close buddy vulnerability, is supposed to be productive when introduced in the office setting. It shouldn’t stop your co-workers in their tracks. It shouldn’t be cringey.

Authenticity should help your company grow and adapt.

Values: Your’s and Your Employer’s

Of course, bringing your whole self to work is a lot easier when your values match your employers and vice-versa. I never really thought I would be the type of person who cared about their work being fulfilling or not. I thought I would just go in, do my work, and that was it.

But a funny thing happens when you do work at a company or a series of companies where your values match your employers. You get the feeling that your co-workers actually care about you. Or that the work you do makes a difference to someone – not just money and profit, but a difference. You don’t want to let that go.

It turns out, human beings want to work with other human beings. And buy from other human beings. Who’d have thought.

I know this is harder to implement at some workplaces than others. That’s the problem with big, broad solutions – open offices! flexible seating! Mandatory yoga! – that are applied with a thick brush. They fail to take into account the particular contours of a business and its people.

Some businesses need their people to wear the armor, sometimes literally. Others, not so much. It is really up to each business leader to set the tone of how much vulnerability is allowed in their workplaces, how much of their whole selves their employees can take to work with them. That’s not something that can be decreed with the latest organizational business trend headline.

Vulnerability Unacknowledged

Front Porch Marketing is in a creative business. Our clients come to us for creative solutions, to find opportunities they don’t see, weaknesses they don’t detect. We can’t do these things without having some empathy for our clients and their customers.

Creativity comes from empathy, an ability to step outside of yourself and into someone else’s shoes. And with empathy, vulnerability often decides to pay a visit too. We must be honest with ourselves and with each other to help our clients. Or else our vulnerabilities can turn into blind spots, dangers just outside our peripheral vision that we know are there but we choose not to see or acknowledge.

But, What Does It Mean?

Anyway, back to that article. Julie and I had an interesting talk about it. We didn’t always see eye to eye, but that’s not why I sent it to her, to convince her one way or another. I guess I wanted to share something that is important to me.

Maybe that’s what bringing your whole self to work means. It means that you have the opportunity, if you choose to, to share with your co-workers the things that matter to you, without judgement or fear.

Well, that sounds a lot better than an open office.   

Sometimes I think the myth of work/life balance was designed to drive people crazy. People are encouraged, prodded even, to give all aspects of their life equal value and equal effort all the time. Be awesome at work! Have the neatest, tidiest house on the block! Be the perfect spouse!

It’s exhausting. And to a life-long worrier, it’s like cat-nip. If cat-nip was addicting but not at all enjoyable.

It should be called a work/life balancing act – something that is dipping from one side to another, always in flux. The word “balance” alone implies that you should shoot for a neat state of equilibrium all the time. And that is ridiculous.

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It is human nature to think that the grass is greener on the other side.

I always look at other people with envy and awe at how much better at adulting everyone else around me seems to be.

Only snippets of people’s lives are visible to us. We don’t see our co-workers frantically trying to hustle their kids out the door in the morning because they’re late for school, or their hour-long commute to work, or the guilt they feel for ordering pizza for dinner because they are too exhausted to even think about making dinner.

Often, we only see people at their best, not at their frantic worst. Everyone, everyone, has rough spots in the lives. No one sails through life on a perfectly calm sea.

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Acknowledge that life is like that sometimes

My mom often said “Life is like that sometimes” when I was kid and it drove me crazy. I remember always thinking, “Well, maybe life shouldn’t be like that mom!” Well, my mom was right. Life is messy and the sooner we can accept this, the better.

I don’t think its any coincidence that the first three letters in acknowledge are A-C-K.

Figure out an everyday ritual or routine you can carve out each day

I find that when I take the time in the morning to have some quiet time to myself, have my cup of coffee, journal a little, and read, I feel a lot better. It’s a nice way to start off my day and when the rest of my day goes sideways, as it inevitably does, I can take some solace in having done something for myself.

This ritual can look different for everyone, and it doesn’t have to be the first thing in the morning. Maybe at the end of the night, you can have a mini-spa moment and slather on all the skin-care potions you want. Or start your day with prayer and a moment of gratitude. Whatever your ritual looks like, it can serve as a calming mental anchor when everything else in your day is beyond your control.

Exercise a different part of your brain

I am fortunate that my work involves a variety of tasks and projects. One day I might be designing some graphics for social media, another day I might be writing a marketing plan. I find that being able to switch between two disparate tasks helps with my well-being immensely. If I feel like one task is turning into a brain drain, I can do something else completely different.

What if your job doesn’t involve a lot of variety? Take up a hobby. And I don’t mean watching endless amounts of YouTube (guilty). I think when people hear “hobby” they think of buying a ton of art supplies and painting the next Mona Lisa.

The key to having an enjoyable hobby is to make it sustainable – a hobby that doesn’t take up a lot of time, mental effort or physical space. I used to paint and draw, but honestly, it feels like such a task to break out my paints and brushes sometimes. So, I read or rip into my bajillion magazines and make a mini-collage. Very satisfying and with minimal fuss.

You gotta let that stuff go

Julie says this to me all the time, in a variety of situations. And you know what, it’s true.

The bottom line is this: The idea of balance that society tries to force upon us doesn’t actually work with this thing called life. Stop feeling guilty for not achieving the ideal of balance and instead work on what makes you feel balanced.

Remember: guilt serves no one.

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There is always going to be something in your life that is out-of-balance. Great things can, and often do, happen out of messy accidents: penicillin, microwave ovens, Post-Its, the Slinky, the Pacemaker.

Do I think I am going to create the next great invention out of the detritus of my life? No. Do I think the best things often come out of the messiness and happen-stance of life? Yes.

For example…

I was a military child growing up and that meant moving a lot. From Kindergarten to High School, I changed schools nine times and moved six times. As a teenager, I remember thinking to myself “when I grow up, I do not want to marry a military man because I don’t want to move around a lot.” Then Fate said, “Hold my beer” and I married a railroader instead.

We have moved four times in eleven years and have never lived in one place more than four years. Moving around so much can be hard (getting a house ready to sell is exhausting). But I have made some great friends along the way and built my skillset in a way that has helped my career immensely.

And all that moving around as a kid was good for me too. It’s how I met my husband.

In college, I was worried about what in the world I was going to do with a History degree. One day, I literally stumbled upon a poster in the College of Arts & Sciences building that listed all the career fields you can go into with a liberal arts degree. And one of those fields was Public Relations. That set me on the career path in marketing that I am still on today.

In the moment, it’s difficult to see how all of this will play out in the end

It’s only in looking back that we can see that the hardest times can create fortitude, a skill or a friendship that helps us in the present. My first real job out of college, working for a PR agency, was like a PR bootcamp. It was hard. It was stressful. But I learned so much and there are skills I picked up during that time in my life that I still use today.

Plus, it’s how I met Julie. And thirteen years later, when she was looking for someone to join her agency, and I had just moved back to Texas, it all came together.

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No one knows how life is going to turn out. Sometimes you’re up, sometimes you’re down. So, instead of trying to chase down something that doesn’t exist and seemingly only serves to drive people crazy – like work/life balance – embrace the mess and accept the uncertainty. Your house will be a wreck, you will miss your kid’s soccer game, you will blow it at work.

It’s in the small, everyday efforts and messy moments of life that you are building up to something greater. You just don’t know it yet.

Remember, life is in the living. So, go live it.

I have been to plenty of conferences before, but I don’t think any a conference has resonated with me quite like this year’s Nonprofit Communicators Conference. Judging from the theme alone, “Communication for Social Good, Impact, Authenticity and Executive Presence”, the conference could have been six hours of well-worn clichés. Instead, I came away with a lot of great insights.

Authenticity Matters

When I hear words like “authenticity,” it sounds like one of those touch-ey feel-ey phrases that make me roll my eyes. Why should we care if a company is being authentic or not?

We live in interesting times. Globally, we are experiencing a lack of trust in institutions, including schools, media, government, and yes, nonprofits. With the share of Americans donating to nonprofits in decline, this lack of trust is disturbing news.

For-Profit companies cannot afford to ignore this reality either. Almost two-thirds of the consumers around the world based their purchasing decisions on their beliefs.

Authenticity is knowing your story and owning it. It is your history and your values. These values must be proven over and over again. A company’s history, story, and values are how they can inspire others.

Here are a few authentic brands. Is your brand an authentic reflection of your company?

Leadership Models are Changing

When I saw that there would be a workshop on executive presence and internal communication, I thought it would be someone telling us to “power pose” our way through work. The workshop turned out to be much more than that.

I used to think of a leader as a hard-charging person who was often the loudest or the most extroverted. Sort of like a bull in a china shop, but more charismatic. More of drill sergeant than a coach.

This “command and control” model of leadership is changing. People spend more than 90,000 hours of their lives at work. Our work and personal lives often blend into each other; with many workers who are expected to be “on” 24/7. I think these people deserve better than a drill sergeant for a boss.

Leaders listen, are constantly learning, they always ask for feedback and they are other-centered.

Leaders also have a “magic sauce” called Executive Presence.

Executive Presence is Crucial

What is executive presence? It’s the qualities of leadership that

“…align, engage, inspire and move people to act.”

– Suzanne Bates, Executive Coach

According to the Bates Executive Presence model, there are three dimensions of executive presence:

• Character – Qualities of a leader as a person that are fundamental to who they are and give us reason to trust them. These qualities include integrity, concern for others, and humility.
• Substance – Cultivated qualities of mature leadership that inspire commitment, inform action and lead to above-and-beyond effort. These qualities include practical wisdom, composure and vision.
• Style – Over, skill-based patterns of communicative leadership that build motivation and that shape and sustain performance. Behaviors like intentionality, inclusiveness and assertiveness fall into this category.

Executive presence is an inside>out process, it starts with inner work. The workshop presenter described executive presence with a flight analogy – executive presence is like “putting on your oxygen mask first.” You must know who you are – your story, your voice, your values – before you can expect to lead others.

You can’t bluff your way through executive presence. True leaders are difficult to come by for a reason. Anyone can bark orders at people. Few people can actually inspire others to act.

I know which type of leader I would like to follow and which type of leader I aspire to be.

The Power of Storytelling

Human beings are wired for stories. Stories are a universal language. They carry weight, often even more so than facts because stories can make us feel something – joy, sadness, anger, etc.

Both organizations and individuals must know their story to make an impact in this world. A few questions to think about when contemplating your own story:

• What is the story you are telling the world? Do your organization’s values match your deeds?
• Whose story are you telling?
• How will you tell your story? Does your story lend itself to video? Social media? A podcast?

Stories matter – they inform our world view and they can inspire others to action. What’s your story?

Corporate Culture Communicates a Lot

Today’s workplace asks a lot of its employees, and employees are looking for more in return. In fact, as many other institutions are losing the public’s trust, people are increasingly placing their trust in their employers. Globally, 75 percent of people trust “my employer” to do what is right, significantly more than NGOs (57 percent), business (56 percent) and media (47 percent).

Culture is a kind of communication; it conveys what your company values. When your corporate culture is aligned with your values, when your company “walks the walk,” your employees are more engaged. An engaged workforce is a productive workforce.

And a word of caution from the conference: “Social media has raised the stakes of internal organizational culture.” You don’t want one of your employees becoming so disengaged from their work that they pull an … emergency slide.

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The conference resonated with me for a few different reasons, but they basically boil down to this: I feel like I am at a point in my life where questions about authenticity and leadership are becoming more and more important. How we present ourselves to the world, whether it’s in a professional or personal setting, matters. The stories we tell are important. And whether we are being true to our authentic selves, is paramount.

Now, if you will excuse me, I’ve got some inner work to do.

This is my brother, pictured with my son, who adores police officers, because of my brother. He is a husband, a son, a grandson, a brother, the BEST uncle, a nephew, a cousin, and a soon to be (within days) daddy. He is also a police officer. He signs up his days and nights to care for the citizens he has sworn to protect and serve. He answers calls that could cause him harm. He answers calls that save others from harm. He investigates accidents. He protects motorists and protestors from traffic accidents. He is a good police officer. His intentions and morals are good and without regard of race, as are most police officers.

His life matters to his wife, to his son, to our parents, to me as his sister, to our Mimi, and to my children who look up to him with the greatest love and admiration.

He is the best of the best and is a police officer.

He is one who will teach the next generation how to love one another despite our differences.

Through his actions he will continue to teach my children, and his, what it means to serve others – even those who hate him only because of the uniform he wears. Without him, many lives could be lost, all while he risks his own.

He serves as a personal and living reminder that each of the people who choose to risk their safety for others is a loved one, as are those whose lives have been lost at the hands of a police officer, with or without cause.

We have to love one another. We have to serve one another. We have to learn to respect and honor one another. We have to forgive one another. We have to protect one another – for He holds ALL in the palm of His hands.

Melissa Tyra is a wife, mom, lover of animals, food, wine, reading and travel. She is also someone we love very much and deeply respect.

Your brand is one of the most important parts of developing or reinvigorating your company. The process of branding examines the emotions you want your customer to feel about your company and its services.

Branding means different things to different people. When working with Clients, we on the Porch serve it up this way:

Simply put, your brand is your promise to your customer.

One of the steps in our branding elaborative is defining brand affiliation. This is done after the vision, personality and positioning are established, because all these factor into the affiliation.

Brand affiliation is best described as what “club” customers are joining when they choose your company. Humans are compelled to affiliate with people like themselves, people they admire or people they aspire to be like. Brand affiliation is what you want other people to think of your company when they learn they are aligned with you.

Once your affiliation is established, you can position yourself in environments that share your affiliation. Say what?

Depending on your company, that might be more complicated than it seems. Here’s an example from our very own Porch:

We want to work with forward-thinking, passionate business leaders and entrepreneurs. We want everyone to have a knock-your-socks off, head turning, register-ringing marketing strategy!

So how do we do that, and maximize our affiliation?

1. We live, breathe and sing marketing strategy and insight with anyone that will join us on the Porch.
2. We provide marketing implementation.
3. We align ourselves with groups and organizations like Vistage, WBENC, NEW, Community Partners and liked-minded business owners.
4. We conduct workshops like our Chief Rocker’s November 4, “Business in a Box” workshop at the Arlington Inspired Women Luncheon.

 

Your brand is derived from who you are, who you want to be and who people perceive you to be. Define it and Rock It. Every Day. All Day.

 

Highs and lows in life are inevitable. Things change, our realities shift and sometimes we find ourselves in a low cycle. Although these times in our life are never fun, they offer tremendous opportunities for growth. When you find yourself facing adversity, look for these silver linings:

1. You will find strength you never knew you had. Often times we fear the worst case scenario and wonder how we will handle failure. The answer is, you will be fine. You will persevere. And discovering this truth is empowering.

2. You will find your people. During tough times, look around. Who is there supporting you? Really supporting you? These are your people. Everyone else is periphery. Again, this discovery is a gift.

3. You will simplify your life. In times of confusion and strife, simplification is necessary. You must focus on only what is truly important. Everything that isn’t important falls away.

4. Your character and conviction will get you through. Regardless of where you find yourself, there is a reason. Stay the course. Remain true to what you know is right and honorable. There is peace in this.

It’s during hard times that we learn the most valuable lessons in life.

Silver. Linings.

Everybody remembers the “make a wish” tale – you must choose wisely, as you only get three wishes, and the wishes must all be considered wisely. From this tale, we learn that we must be careful what we ask for.

I like to ask questions. Maybe too many, but questions always provide answers..unless you ask the wrong question. Have you ever asked the wrong question? Yes. You. Have. I have too!

Get it right! Ask the right question.

Good question asking is a skill and can be applied to all relationships – spouse, children, employee, employer, friends, customers, etc. The applications are endless. Every question can deepen our understanding of a topic or person. There is no such thing as a stupid question, but there are ways to ask a question that are better than others.

Here are some examples:

• Q: How was your day? A: good, bad, great, awesome, etc. This closed-ended question doesn’t really give you much, so follow up with what made your day _______? Now we are getting somewhere! Tip: Dig deeper with follow-up questions. Follow general questions with specific ones. 
• Q: How are sales? A: Great they have doubled! This general question can elicit an answer that can be misleading – sales doubled from what? Better question: How are your sales compared to this same timeframe last year? Tip: Make sure to ask for context and reference to give the answer meaning.
• Have you ever been asked if you want “anything else?” I hate this question. The answer is, of course I do, I have a long list of else, but you don’t sell them here. Another egregious offender: Did you find everything ok? Tip: Specific questions will garner more insight. Try to avoid yes or no questions unless they are truly satisfying a simple purpose.
• Recently my husband called me and informed me that he grounded the kids. I asked, “What does grounding mean in our house?” We figured out our definition of grounding because of an open-ended question. Tip: Have a purpose for asking and a desire to know the answer. Every question you ask should help you gather either facts or elicit an opinion. Know which kind of information you need and frame your questions accordingly.
• What if someone asked you if it was it sunny on the day you were born? I don’t know if it was sunny when I was born – does it matter? I can’t think of one thing someone would do with this information. Tip: Ask questions only if the information elicited is necessary. If you don’t really need the answer, don’t ask the question. Be respectful of people’s time and attention. Answer this – what will you do with the answer?

We ask questions because that is the way we improve, learn, connect and tell stories. Ask away, friends!

“Successful people ask better questions, and as a result, they get better answers.” ~ Tony Robbins